I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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