the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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