And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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