Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
