please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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