so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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