sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
