"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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