dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
