My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
