I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
