I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
