morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
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