Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
