He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
