im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Randomize
