Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
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