Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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