I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
