i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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