Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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