dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
