your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Randomize
