I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
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