if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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