I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
