We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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