...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
