There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize