fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
this will be a night to untag.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
