shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
