Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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