You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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