Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
there is puke in my bra ... again
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
