Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
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