I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
