I puked a lego.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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