I wanna bring you to show and tell
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
