Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
she looked like the before picture.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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