at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
