Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
