she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize
