I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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