i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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