Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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