what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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