Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
