Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
