Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Randomize
