She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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